“If I can teach you anything, it is to identify the stressful thoughts that you are believing, and to question them, to get still enough so that you can hear your own answers. Stress is the gift that alerts you to your asleepness. Feelings like anger or sadness exist only to alert you to the fact that you are believing your own stories.” Byron Katie
Social comparison has been around since the beginning of time. We’ve used comparison to gauge our successes and our failures, often causing us to be motivated or inspired to push ourselves in many domains. But with the explosion of social media outlets, compounded by the pandemic and the drastic shift to living our lives online we are spending more time scrolling through our social media feeds that are often plastered with our friend’s latest vacation, cute workout outfit, or family photos. And the inordinate amount of time that we spend scrolling through our feed is causing us to feel the backlash of comparison, leaving us feeling more broken than ever.
We see photos of our friends smiling and posing, which leads us to believe that all is well. But with anxiety and depression rates skyrocketing it leaves me to wonder are we being genuine? Are these online connections causing us to feel more connected and real, or disillusioned and unsure? How often do we pull the curtain back and reveal our authentic selves? And exactly who are we, truly? We think that truth is truth, that it’s not subjective, that it’s black or white. But is that true? Truth is defined as a fact or belief that is accepted as true. So if that is the case, then maybe the greater question is “What do we believe is true?”
If we are not mindful we can let all of the outside conditioning be the gauge that we compare ourselves to, often leading us to be confused about exactly who we are and what we believe.
What stories do you tell yourself about you? That you can’t do the work that needs to be done to become a healthier person. That you are too old. That you aren’t disciplined enough. That you are not smart enough. Not strong enough. Not pretty enough.